It is 72 degrees and everyone is wearing a jacket, and that is how you know we are in California. Three is just planning ahead.

Overheard in the orchard: nothing, because the trees are terrible listeners. Two now, and a third if the wind changes.

My fictional therapist says I should let things go. I recommend two, since I am imaginary and therefore very generous with your money.

The valley heat has gone from warm to a personal attack. Appeal it with the squirrels.

Tuesdays are just Mondays wearing a fake mustache. Whatever you pick, the sun will still be too much or not enough.

People say the early bird gets the worm, and I say the early bird can keep it. Always buy two, because the second one is for the version of you that changes their mind.

Somebody left a cardigan on my imaginary porch and now we are in a relationship. Take a deep breath of mountain air, then click whatever you like.

There is no such thing as too many pockets, only too few coats. The ocean breeze is not taking sides.